Not so fast

Morning ritual: Shower, blah, blah, blah. Drive to work. Stop at Coffee Shop for crack :). Narrowly escape brawl with guards. Sit down at desk and read the latest breaking news. And settle in for a day of work.

This morning things got a little screwy. The part where I read latest breaking news? Turns out it's homework. haha!! Somebody has to do homework! Oh wait.. RE.. that's me. Doh!

So the homework is that I have to tell the world six things they don't know about me. And then 'tag' six more people to do the same.

I'm not much into these things. But you know, MM's cool and stuff. And I really didn't have an idea for a blog today anyway. The really lame thing though?? I don't know anyone who blogs on here except MM. Oh wait!!! I can totally pull the "why haven't you been blogging?! You read my blog all the time and always say how you want to start blogging. Now's your chance!" card. Woah, that's a big card.

So ER. Ha! That's RE backward. Woah. Anyway, you're tagged.

Big Apple Girl.. you're tagged. Are you coming down this weekend btw?

You girls are way overdue on the blogging. So get 'er done! You can totally say "I made you do it".

Okay, yeah, I'll have to think on the other four. The assignment said six! I'm so lame, GOSH! Heh.. dude, can I borrow some friends?

So at long last... six things you really could do without knowing about me.

1. I snore. Not the cute little girl kind of snore. I mean, I SNORE. Probably lots of girls snore. It's just not the sort of thing we're supposed to admit to until you've said "in sickness and in health" and all that nonsense. But I was never really the type to follow the rules. My roommate ER refuses to let me crash on her futon EVER AGAIN. Some psycho babble about not being able to sleep. Personally, I just try not to let the little things bother me. :P

2. I'm a total wuss. I'm terrified of heights. I'm afraid of getting hurt. I mean, I try to act all tough and stuff but I'm a total weenie. It's been a long hard struggle pushing myself to rock climb and mountain bike. Seriously the first time I tried rock climbing. INDOORS. I could only go about 10ft off the ground. I'm getting better but still a sissy-girl at heart.

3. When I was in fourth grade I wrote a story in school about a dragon. My teacher and my parents thought it was this fantastic elaborate story. But I could have sworn the idea came from a cartoon or something I had seen. I'm not entirely sure. I remember feeling like I had cheated. But maybe not?? I didn't mean to cheat. People get ideas from all kinds of places. But I don't think I blatantly copied someone else's idea. Regardless, I still feel guilty about it.

4. I secretly don't think I'm very good at my job. But maybe everyone feels that way?? I work really hard and try to get a lot done. But I always have the feeling "someone will find out" that I'm really not what they think. My Dad said a lot of people feel that way. They're honest people, they just don't think they're good enough.

5. My room is very, very messy. And I would like to say it's a temporary state resulting from the extreme clogginess (see I can make up words) of my schedule. But really, it's rather consistently messy. I do clean it sometimes. Uh huh! There was that time.. back in November!! But it never stays that way for very long. I blame the fact that I have too much stuff. So this weekend my goal is to start getting rid of some stuff. I envy MM's house. She's so neat! And way uncluttered.

6. My clothes face left in the closet. I never wore braces. Never participated in a spelling bee. Did okay in shop class. (I had chicken pox before that.) Don't really have phone number issues. I don't like diet anything. And sunshine's cool, but I like the rain just as much.

Update: This was a total lie. My clothes face right.

Okay then! Now that you know some very random, and disappointingly negative, things about me. You can go on with your day. ER, BA Girl, I totally expect a blog by the end of the day!

I had no idea

I always joke about how I need to join a support group for Starbucks addicts. But after my previous blog I thought I'd see if there were any out there. There totally are. But there are also tons of other sites related to Starbucks. Who knew?

Addicted and Proud
Support your local coffee shop
What's in your coffee?
Starbucks vs. The Addict
Starbucks Gossip
IT Geeks who want to work for Starbucks

I'm fickle that way

I love Starbucks. In fact, I have on more than one occasion professed my undying love for their charred cups of delicious nectar in this very blog. But despite our involvement, I frequently cheat on them with the first available alternative. It’s not that I have anything against Starbucks. No, that’s not true. I have a lot against Starbucks. They're a seemingly enormous empire that sold themselves out for money and fame. Honestly though, I would have done the same. They have a hugely profitable enterprise. And they seem to be a good company to work for. Besides, it still feels like a small coffee shop even though they're a multimillion dollar business.

I go to Starbucks because they’re fast, friendly, consistent, and they don't tell me I need to make a purchase of $5 in order to use my debit card. It's amazing the things that influence consumer behavior. And also, it's on the way to work. I mean they're on every damn corner. But, as I discovered yesterday, so is Murky Coffee. On the way to work I mean.

Drawn by their clever name, and my desire to be wooed away from the evil clutches of Starbucks, I stopped in. I wasn't sure if they were open because it seemed deserted. But the tiny little sign said they opened at 7 and I peered in and spotted the laptop guy in the corner and the runner girl on the couch. I ordered a latte. Paid $4.25 (ouch). And waited.

And waited. And waited.

Dude was busy back there. And clearly an experienced Barista. But wow that latte took a while. But when I tasted it? Way worth the wait. And I totally dig cheating on Starbucks. It's almost like volunteer work. I feel I'm giving back to my community. Well, not quite. But you know what I'm sayin'. No need to line Starbuck's pockets. I'm trying to support the little guy here.

So Murky Coffee is where I shall stop for my morning crack until it becomes a pain or I find some other excuse to revisit Starbucks. I'm sure I will relapse. It's inevitable. But there's always rehab right? There must be support groups for this.

Hi, my name is uh.. Jane, and I'm addicted to Starbucks. *sob!*

The romance of travel

I love to go places. It doesn't matter where I'm going, but something about the getting there part is so intoxicating to me. It could be a long car ride, a plane ride, a bus, a boat, a train. It doesn't matter.

Last night I had a two hour layover in the Detroit Airport. It was just like every other layover in every other airport I've ever been in. I was wearing my favorite jeans and I sat curled up in the last seat in a row of vinyl chairs, the ones with arm rests in between so you can lay across them. I had my Starbucks coffee in hand (You can't imagine my excitement when I found a Starbucks on my way to the gate.), my bag sitting next to me, and my hair all tied up in a knot. The only thing missing was the attractive boy sitting next to me. If he had been there I would have leaned my head on his shoulder to complete the moment. Hopefully he'll go along next time. But I just sat there watching people and thinking about the richness of the experience.

It's like John Mayer's song 'Wheel'. So much sadness, so much joy, so much anticipation and excitement. And all in one place.

Airports see it all the time
Where someone's last goodbye
Blends in with someone's sigh
Cause someone's coming home
In hand a single rose
And that's the way this wheel Keeps working out
And I won't be the last to love her

Maybe that song has defined my emotions about travelling. But more likely, it so eloquently describes what I've always felt. I always find myself contemplating things more deeply when I travel. Perhaps it's the catalyst of the changes I feel when I'm taken away from familiarity. I consider my life as it is. The things I used to imagine for myself and how they have or have not come to be. And the future that lays before me. I consider friends, relationships, family, and all of the people around me. It's one of the only times I feel absolutely connected to reality and aware of the world and happy to be a small part of it.

I believe that my life's gonna see
The love I give return to me

Our first Friendiversary!

It was actually yesterday. I know this because I remember a distinctive smell emanating from one of the first people we met on our adventure a year ago.

"So, um... Celebrating?? he.. your eyes aren't red at all!"

Hey, where'd my food go?!

We're totally still bff.

Catch 22

Alright, so I want to be a nice person. But I don't want to be walked upon. But what happens when I have to choose? I mean, I can try to be nice while in fact telling someone not to walk all over me. But am I really being nice? And would it be nice if I let them walk all over me and just fumed about it??

People do dumb stuff. And sometimes when you say "hey, that was dumb" they get upset. So either, you let them do dumb stuff that affects you, or you say "stop it" and risk them getting upset.

I find that I have to decide whether or not the person is important to me. And then decide if I can prevent their stupidity from affecting me without actually having to confront them. Cuz, well, I'm not your mother. Grow the F up and stop being dumb. It's not my job to coddle you. But if they're someone I care about, then it becomes important to confront them, yet be as kind as possible, so that our friendship can outlast the current conflict.

But is it fair to stop caring about someone in order to avoid having to be nice to them? Weird question, I know, but I wonder this. Because I have de-friended people because it just seems stupid to sit there and boost their ego when they're the ones that F-ed up and really they just need to grow up and I never really cared that much in the first place. What if that were me? Honestly? I'd rather someone not have to cradle my ego and walk on egg shells around me because I was a little pipsqueek and couldn't handle a little criticism.

I have also de-friended people because I was forced to 'play nice' rather than listen to them whine about how I criticized them as I would a person I truly cared for and wanted to resolve conflict with.

Basically? I'd rather not be friends with you if I can't tell you something that bothered me without you having a tantrum that requires me to kiss your ass. Right? Problem. Discussion. Solution. Done.

Beware your judgemental thoughts

I was at work the other day, and a coworker asked me about Yoga as way to address some pain issues she has. I have sort of inadvertently developed a reputation as the go-to girl about exercise and health questions. But this particular person is not someone I would have ever expected to ask a question like that. She seems very healthy. Just not someone who would need or want advice from me. It took me completely by surprise. Pleasantly though. And I had to scold myself for my judgmental thoughts.

It seems it's the quiet ones you wonder about. The verbal or otherwise expressive people who share their thoughts and feelings with you are usually known entities. You pretty much know when they're pleased or not, and you can react accordingly. But the ones who keep to themselves, or seem to be displeased, those are the ones you have to work to understand. But it gets even more complex with some people. Expressive or not, you just never know.

I teach a few classes at my gym. Mostly BodyPump, but also Sculpt, and I'll soon be adding BodyFlow to my repertoire. So when you're at the front of the room with anywhere from ten to sixty pairs of eyes on you, you get a variety of reactions. There are the people who set up front and center where the action is. They usually laugh at my jokes and chat with me before or after class about this or that. There are the ones that hide in the back and try not to be seen. There are the ones who just sort of hang out in the middle and react some of the time, and everything in between. So I often wonder whether people get what I say, enjoy the class, wish I were dead, whatever. You just want to know.

But I have to remind myself that just because someone doesn't speak, doesn't mean they don't love my class. Or just because they're in the front row doesn't mean they're happy with me either. So I try to treat everyone as though they're just as happy to be there as I am whether they show it or not. And more often than not, I get very positive feedback for treating people this way.

I always try to encourage the new people taking that leap into something new, and I try to touch base with my hard core regulars. But it's a little more difficult to interact with the middle group. I want to help them along without "calling them out". I want to show them I'm excited to have them in class without putting them out of their comfort zone and even worse, make them shy away from coming to class. I do my best. Sometimes I suck at it. But sometimes I get a huge heartwarming smile or a very thoughtful comment that I would never have expected. And it's so rewarding and makes it all worthwhile. It makes me wonder why anyone would want to do anything other than teach group exercise. It's wonderful.

I mean, who knows, my class might be the high point in someone's day. It might be what keeps them going. Exercising might be something they hate doing, but my class makes it bearable. You just never know. So I remind myself to put my smile on my face, give my class everything I have, and beware my judgmental thoughts.

Easily amused

I usually drink a protein shake for breakfast every morning. I start sippin' away when I get to work around 7:30 and it generally takes until noon to finish. I put the same thing in it every time. Fruit, protein powder, flax seed oil, coconut oil, flax seeds, water, a little oj for flavor, and some nutritional yeast. Mostly it's just a fat free, protein rich breakfast, and I get some good oils and vitamins in the process.

Sometimes if I'm feeling exceptionally lazy, I'll just put the yeast in a cup of juice and call it breakfast. Yeast is awesome stuff. It's not the bread-baking stuff, it's more like brewer's yeast. It's nutty-tasting flaky stuff that has a bunch-o-vitamins and minerals. It does all kinds of things like keep me from having bad dreams, regulates my blood sugar, and gives my body a ton of amino acids.

So this morning I was feeling exceptionally lazy. I grabbed my juice, dumped in my yeast, and hi-ho-hi-ho, it's off to work I went. I had some form of granola around 8 that sustained me long enough to get some work done. And about 11 I decided to drink my juice.

Gulp, gulp..

About half way through I started to feel a little itchy. And then sort of warm.

Am I allergic to juice now too?!

Gulp, gulp..

Then my face starts to feel hot. I don't want to be allergic to juice! I like juice!

Gulp, gulp..done.

Okay, now the hair on my head is standing up. Is this what hives feel like?

Well, I guess it's a little late now..

Wait! I know what it is! I'm having a niacin flush!! Sweet! Well, sort of not. But cool! I haven't had a niacin flush in years!

Niacin, a.k.a. Vitamin B3, is one of the plethora of vitamins in my yummy nutritional yeast cocktail. It naturally dilates your capilaries allowing the cells in your body to dump toxins in the blood to be filtered out by the liver. But it also generates this nice warm flush and a bit of itchiness caused by the histamine hormone. Neat right?

You know you really need niacin when you get a flush, because you develop a sort of tolerance to the amount of the vitamin your body is accustomed to having. So I'm super excited! Even though it means I haven't been taking my niacin. Bad!! But yay! I love to see my 'voodoo' working for me.

No really, I'm not hungry.

Ever read those Chicken Soup for the Soul books? They've got these cute little stories in them about the little boy who wants the puppy with the bum leg because the little boy has a bum leg too. Or the guy putting the starfish back in the sea so they don't drown when the tide goes out.

Yeah, so I was sitting on the couch after Easter dinner and there's one of those pocket-sized Chicken Soup books on the coffee table. So I pick it up. Mistake number one. I read a few stories (they're really short), and I rememeber why I never read them. The damn stories make me want to cry. Every one. My eyes tear up. So you think I could just put the book down. Nope.

Stop reading!!! Stop it!

Still reading. My throat gets all tight again and I scold myself for still reading.

Why are you still reading?

Yes, I know it's a nice story but it's making you cry!! What's new? Everything makes me cry. I am an emotional wreck. Ha! Girl = Emotional Wreck.

Know what finally made me stop reading? I read them all. Damn! Anybody have a tissue?

I guess I need to stick with Buffy. Tree pretty, fire bad. Keep it simple. GOSH! Who writes these stories anyway?

Buy him... bids starting at $10

If this ain't the craziest thing I've ever seen, I don't know what is.

Jeepers Creepers(v2)

I work in a cubicle farm. Sad but true. It's an odd arrangement. The illusion of privacy, with actually no privacy at all. Kind of like public bathroom stalls. But anyway.. At first it took a bit of focus but I finally found a certain comfort level with, or perhaps ignorance of the lack of privacy. Sometimes the occasional "bless you" coming through the wall seems a bit odd. "God? Is that you?" And sometimes it's hard not to respond to questions asked in the next cubicle. But for the most part I'm pretty used to it.

One thing that really bugs the crap out of me, is the guy who walks down the isle peeping into every cubicle he walks by. You know exactly who I'm talking about. That one guy that just can't mind his own. Why does he feel compelled to do this?? I mean, I guess it’s not so obvious when you’re the fish in the fishbowl. Maybe if "they" didn't design every cube so that your back is to the “opening” it might be a little more obvious. (How sad it’s not even a door. Sounds a bit dirty really. I actually totally get the "rear view mirror" now.) And did you ever watch that guy walk down a row of cubes and alternately turn his head to look into ALL the cubes on each side? Sort of reminds you of a chicken bobbing its head in search of bugs. Granted, it may be subconscious and he just plain doesn’t realize he’s doing it. But man, sometimes I just wanna be like "LOOKING FOR SOMEONE?!?"

So I feel have no choice. I dub thee.. Mr. Peeper. (Can you do that POOFING part again? I'm not sure I'm a very good POOFER!) I wouldn’t say it’s Peeping-Tom creepy. But it’s a little bit nosey. Not to mention you look like a freakin' idiot! GOSH! Of course, I’m sure we’ve all done it. I just wish I could suggest to the guy, "hey, think you could just walk down the hall and maybe gaze in the general direction in which your walking?" I mean, who does he think he is, the Warden? Thanks but the inmates could probably do without your supervision. Besides, we totally already have a warden!!

It's midnight.

And I wonder why I'm so tired at work all the time. Oh yeah, and it's actually 1 am because we lost an hour. Damn Spring.

Ode to Spring

... and the obligatory Cherry Blossom photo.


I love every season. I've tried hard to find something I like just a little bit more about one than the other three, but I can't. I love them all equally. When I was younger I used to think my parents must love either my sister or I more, they just lied when we asked them which of us it was. I was convinced equality on that level was impossible. But now I believe they did love us both exactly the same.

This is from the magnolia tree in our back yard. I had no idea it was there until today.

Escape

To offset the insane and rather oppressive hours I've been working the last week or so, I went rock climbing today. I almost didn't. I had planned to go, but then slept in and sort of made an unspoken decision to skip it. THANK GOD THAT DIDN'T WORK OUT. With some much needed and greatly appreciated coersion, I decided to go anyway. Work could wait.

It was an absoultely gorgeous day for my first climb this season. The breeze was blowing, the sun shining, and I had some fabulous company. S2H invited his coworker H to climb with us. She'd been before but it had been years ago. You totally couldn't tell, she did awesome! :) And I think she had a good time.

Typically you know you've had a good time when you have some reminder from your day. These reminders might be hangovers, scars a.k.a. battle wounds, or things you've brought back with you. Today, thanks to my 3/4 t-shirt and watch, my proof that I had a good time is this.

And what day would be complete without the bandana?

Being at work tonight is worthwhile having been out enjoying the day. Thank you, I really needed that.