I find myself increasingly spellbound by the blogging craze and longing to be immersed in it. I mean I blog, if you can call what I do blogging. But I want to be a real blogger. The kind that gets invited to conventions to speak, and has completely fantastic photos to post, and endless hordes of enthusiastic and/or angry readers commenting endlessly at them. I mean, I read some of these women (and I only say women because so far my idol bloggers are female) and I instantly want to be their friend. They always have some snarky remark that goes amazingly well with a "motherfucker" right in the middle of it. Or at just the right moment they have something sentimental and completely original to say. And you go "damn, this woman rocks!" And oh by the way, this is how she makes her living. How great is that?!
So I am on a quest. To be blog-worthy, to be interesting, to be dynamic and deep or shallow and amusing in just the right way. I don't need to be endlessly popular, as romantic an idea as that may be. I just need to touch someone the way these women touch me, to be useful to someone other than my best friends. Or perhaps just that, to be for my best friends whatever it is they need. Who knows. What I do know is I want more out of this. Because I see potential, I see depth, I see something that means more to me than 9 to 5 or the money in my paycheck that I hated earning. This feels real to me. It makes me feel alive and expressive and empowered. I love this new part of me, and I can't wait to see it grow.
