I had my last pump class last night. For those of you who know me, this is a very big deal. I love body pump. I have lived and breathed body pump for the last year and a half. For a while I was up to 4 of my own classes each week and subbing as many of everyone else's as I could. That's also why I had to drop them all, one by one, and spend hundreds of dollars in physical therapy. My body just wasn't built to pump forever.
My knee is still slowly recovering. But nothing ever happens quickly enough. I was impatient. I just couldn't bear to not squat in class. I tried to just talk the class through the leg work, but I couldn't. Everyone would rush, or be confused, or lose their form, so I would jump back in. And it was setting myself back each week, pushing my knee further than it was able to go. I thought if I cut back my knee would heal, but it needed more. So I gave them all up. I started my first pump class wondering why they wouldn't smile back at me, and left yesterday missing each and every one of their faces, my heart breaking.
A door closes.
Lucky, this past spring I learned to teach Flow. And I love flow. It's not quite the same as pump. A different energy. A good energy, but it can't fill the hole that pump has left. I have two flow classes now. And they're great classes. Prime time, big groups, fun members. I'm getting better, learning how to engage them. It's been a lot of fun.
A door opens.
Losing my last pump class also motivated me to finally pursue my personal training. I've been certified for almost exactly a year now, but have been too busy or too afraid to start training. I walked into the gym where I wanted to teach and all they wanted to know was when I could start. That was easy. Why didn't I try that sooner? I start next week. I'm so excited I can't even explain it. I'm totally nervous, but I think it's going to be great!
Door number two.
Life is all about change. I guess it's hard to remember that when all you feel is your heart breaking from the thing you're losing. But when the new doors open, how can you complain?
